I have a bunch of business stuff to write soon,but something that was said to me has got me a little crazy.

Some one sent me an email telling me

“You are not a healthy inspiration, you posted photos of Dairy Queen on your instagram, you are posting beer, you are posting junk food” “You should get off social media”

Your point is?

I have never said this is a healthy inspiration blog. The goal of my blog has been to be my chalk board about things that are working for me, things that are not working for me. Things I just need to get off my chest. Things I need to communicate out with others ect. There are days I will be working on this so fast that I might miss something in grammer, puncuation, spelling ect.

When it comes down to it my weight loss journey has evolved a lot in eight years. It is flat out not about loosing weight anymore. My doctors tell me I am at a healthy weight even though the BMI says I might be a little big. (I am actually right at 25) Yes, I did get down to 130 for a time. But I should of NEVER been then low. I was not healthy physically or mentally. I had no balance in my life because I was always driving myself crazy being focused on the numbers. And I was not strong. I had no energy, no desire to get up and do anything.

Yes, occasionally I like to walk up to my local Dairy Queen and have a chili dog (for the record the owners make the best chili dogs they are like the ones your parents would make for you when you are kids). My mom and I enjoy a trip to Red Robin on Friday nights after seeing my dad. (Thats our time together to talk, catch up from our crazy week and really be there for each other). I may split a cinnamon roll from the coffee shop down the street with my best friend. Occasionally I like a glass of wine or beer. I like my coffee a lot. I crave a ton of salt during my period.

But I have learned if I stress myself out over the occasional treat. I am going to go bat-#@%$! crazy. It is not worth it.

Yes, I could probably be a faster runner if I would not have those treats. I would be thinner.

Yes, I could be a faster runner if I spent more time at the gym or on the road (for the record I work out 5-6 days a week as it is, I just don’t talk about it all the time, you don’t need to know about every workout). But helping my mom through my dads health issues, working on my non-blog business, doing everything I do in social media, trying to figure out if I can go back to graduate school. I just flat out don’t have enough hours in the day. To me, it has always been about making the best choice I can in the moment while focusing on my goal of living me.

Yes, I don’t race as much as I used to. If you follow me for any length of time you know that my life is complicated. I do not have the money or time to race as much as I want. There are things going on outside my control. It won’t change the fact I love running, running is my thing to get me away from my chaos.

Yes, I have had a few companies that have believed in me and believed in what I am trying to accomplish (I have always said its living in the real world) and have backed me up. I am honored that they have and I really appreciate everything they have done to let me share my journey.

But because I am flat out honest and confess that I am not perfect. That I am just a women trying to live her life and her journey. More often then not, I get rejected. Those rejections suck, but to me I would rather fight for being me then anything else.

The thing in all this. My life is not perfect. But I am happy. I am happy with my body. There are changes that I would like the make in my life and I am always working on those every day. This blog will never be a full on healthy inspiration running blog. There might even be some more professional wrestling posts in my future.

All this being said, if you have come here to follow my crazy journey, you are welcome. If I can say anything, I am going to say this. Live you. That is my goal always. If that inspires you; that is the best thing I can ever hope for.