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Race Recap: Not such a love letter when it comes to @SeattleMarathon

What is the opposite of a love letter?

A Dear John Letter..

A few years ago I wrote a love letter to the Seattle Marathon. Those words at the time had been true. This year…. Well I will let the letter explain it.

Dear Seattle Marathon:

This weekend did me in.

You actually got me to question my love for running.

This year you announced a new course change and the words keep hearing are brutal, awful and relentless. From the second you make the turn off fifth avenue it feels like either you are dealing with a constant uphill climb or a violent sharp up hill. There had been a few downhills but there was no way to find your pace or your stride. The old course would give you chances to recover and get into a stride.

The time on the trails in Sam Smith had been heart breaking. So many runners on a wet path, it was congested and dangerous. I was going at a pretty good clip but got a couple shoves from behind because the path was so crowded. It was heartbreaking and frustrating all at the same time

I never thought I would say this. I miss #whathill. You could pace yourself and be ready for that beast.

I am glad you had such a dedicated crew of volunteers and medical crew. They made that race. They had been encouraging when it seemed like it was time to throw the race away.

I am really proud of how hard I fought through it and finished strong even though mentally I was just shot. But I left the race not excited. I left it flat and not loving running so much.

Your bling left me feeling uninspired and the white shirt is just not something that I would wear on a normal basis. The expo seemed smaller this year as well.

I love you Seattle but this is the first time I have come out of a race wanting to rethink my love of running. I still kept within my goal time frame but it was because of the first three and the last two miles and I was on the super slower end of my window.

I don’t know if I am coming back to you next year. We will see. It will take a lot of rethinking of training and running to convince me to come back in 2018.

– Its not you.. Its me.

Post Script: I really do love the Seattle Marathon and will always consider it a major part of my journey. this year was rough. I know this race is capable of being an amazing crown jewel of the city of Seattle. I was just very disappointment this year and am rethinking my next year plan.

“Nakama” and The Word Inspiration… (Thank you @MizunoRunning)

My running life in the last year has been crazy.

I have not been able to race as much this year, just because there has been some challenges with everything going on with my dad. I have not had the money to race at points which has sucked, training at times has been complicated, but I have never stop running. (Other then right now because I have a really ugly pucked up big toe from Seattle.)

Running has given me so much.

When my day gets chaotic, it is the time for me just to focus on me.

When things get frantic around me and the negative energy seems to be infectious, its there for me.

When I am feeling like I can’t handle what is going on around me, and I don’t feel strong, running has been there to

With my award from Mizuno. Thank you for allowing me to share my story.
With my award from Mizuno. Thank you for allowing me to share my story.
remind me that I can do whatever I put my mind to.

Running also reminds me that I can not ever give up on this journey no matter what road it takes me.

That is one thing I wish I could share with people, that no matter where you road takes you, you can still keep running. If I can keep running through everything I have been through with dad this year. Anyone can.

Mizuno Running agreed with me. And gave me the honor of talking about how running has changed my life. I became this months Mizuno Nakama.

You can read their blog: Nakama

I can not thank Mizuno enough for allowing me this honor. And allowing me to share my story.

It is down right crazy where my running has taken me. As I have said before, I never intended for it to go past it’s first 5K. Now it’s 5 marathons, 15 half, some bigger goals for 2015. I still juggle the idea that I am an inspiration. I just know that if I can change the world around me, anyone can as long as they are willing to put the hard work in. I still have struggles trying to keep myself positive. There are still days that the right choice comes hard.

There are some days people tell me I should give up. There are some who think that eventually I would fail, and I have not.

I made a promise to myself (and to someone else) early in this journey when I started to realize I could trust in myself and what I could do, that I would never give up. I would go wherever this crazy road would take me and never look back.

And I won’t.